A Child by Any Other Name?

Did Isaac wonder as they wandered
“Have I made my father proud?”
When he trembled ‘neath the knife
Do you think he laughed aloud?

Always wondered as I’ve wandered
why you’d place this yoke on me?
Named for the one who gave you life
and stole in the night your dignity

Was Jacob told when he was younger
that he was destined to deceive?
When his name was changed to struggle
Was his broken heart relieved?

Did he tell you when you were under
that no one would ever believe?
So long I’ve looked to be set asunder
From the name you placed on me

Did Ishmael wonder if God listens
when it seemed father never could?
In the shadow of the favored one
stands the dark son, misunderstood

It seemed all your best intentions
would have alluded me for good
in the shadow of the damage done
how could I have understood?

It was your way of healing
when you gave his name to me
The guardian he never was
is everything I’m determined to be

~wwb 4/27/09

every dream i’ve ever had of me

its all been said, its all been said
we all bleed in red, nothing new ‘neath this old moon
we’ll all play dead, we’ll all play dead
we’ve read all the red and tonight we still feel doomed

give me everything that your not
i’ll give you everything that’s left when I am through
im trying to integrate all i’ve got
and all i’ve got left is love and hate for you and you

conventional and sensual, you are
everything I ever thought i was thinking that i knew
provisional, incisional, u cut m e in two
i was thinking if your thinking of me, its the least u could do

come back, come back & leave me be
you’ve been haunting every dream i’ve ever had of me
i don’t want your yellow hill or apron strings
just the one on whom the sun shines when she’s next to me

~wwb

These Things Pale Into Insignificance (Revisited)

These things pale into insignificance
when measured by your grace
but this is a place we refuse to look
and we ask to see your face

If only we really knew
what it is we are asking
If only we truly were content
to hide our face while you are passing

We’ve stood on the mountain
and we’ve been crushed by these stones
the rocks that cry out
and the tablets that were thrown

From generation to generation
still asking for a sign
when it’s a wonder of wonders
that you can still love this heart of mine

And I’m alive because of you
And beside myself inside of you
And I think I’ll find the strength to hide in you

These things will pale into insignificance
no more cold and no more grey
But we are swimming in this dissidence
and miss you here today

If only we truly hoped
in the promise with which you left us
This day – and that
You come to resurrect us

And I’m alive because of you
And beside myself inside of you
And I think you will provide the strength to hide in you

~wwb

Waiting in Place

Mother Mary, perhaps there’s no comfort for me
I simply cannot let it be
My brother’s weary and mourning dawns on me
Where is your word for me?

Restless nights and sleepless days waiting for you
Waiting for your son
Stressless nights and endless days of comfort for
The enemies of love

I thought I saw the sun this morning, I thought
I felt it on my face
You left us with the angels soaring, this world
Keeps me in my place

~wwb

Information Age

let’s get together and share information
laugh at the dj’s on the radio station
do you remember when we met
each & ev’ry kiss was soft and wet
its quiet now in my stream of consciousness
i’ll buy it now – what’s the price for common sense?
mother always told me that I had none
held me tighter than a republican’s hand gun
but i’m not bitter i’m just dying
i think i’ll be okay, promise i’m not lying

~wwb

Sometime Somewhere

I don’t believe in karma,
I don’t believe in luck
I am sad as hell and displaced
but don’t believe I’m stuck

I’m running out of energy
but I don’t believe I’m running out of time
I’m running on caffeine and anger
and I don’t believe in holding it inside

There’s a time for everything
and everything will be okay in time
But I am a part of everything
I want to change everything outside

I don’t believe in second chances,
I just believe in love
I have caused so much damage
7×70 could never be enough

~wwb c. 1999

Yes, We’ll Gather at the River

We wait for one to deliver
Near the banks of the river
Last night was so cold
All our children shivered

In elongated expectation
We wait, we doubt, we fear
But hope is renewed in mourning
When morning skies are clear

~wwb

beneath the sun

roses are dead,
bruises are blue
beneath the sun
there’s nothing new

~wwb

word drone

words blur words slurred words heard can place you in a faction
words stir the herd and we incur the debt for all of our reactions
words cut words build words will always be used as a distraction
conceal the parlor tricks behind the curtain with current fashions

is there a current beneath the current clutter that could be be heard?
a tide that’s nearly died while we drown our selves in self important words
surf the crest of misunderstanding in the ocean of confusion we’ve stirred
and drink deep the magic sleep potion until all of our vision is blurred

~wwb

Hold on to Me

This song has haunted me for some time. This strung out performance even more so. Even if she killed him with hired hands or her own bare hands, there is no question to me as to whether she really loved him and still does. One of my favorite song writers, John Darnielle, says “People say friends don’t destroy one another. What do they know about friends?” Indeed, what the hell do they know? I guess that which is most cliche and universal really is that which is also most personal. We continually hurt those we love. I guess the holidays and family gatherings have me thinking random thoughts about Kurt and Courtney, the Mountain Goats, worn out sayings and my friends & family. My family, my family, my family. I suck at it. I freeze. I don’t know how to communicate. Sometimes it seems the more I love you, the more def and dumb I become. If I push you, please just hold on to me. I will try to do the same.
~wwb